But… I’m an Addict!
Posted By: Aaron Van Gossen | May 11, 2010 | 2 comments
I just don’t get it. Why are celebrities given so much more leeway than the rest of us? Perfect example: In the 80’s, actor, Robert Downey Jr. had the “bad boy” image. But in the 90’s, he became a freaking train wreck. Seriously, I’m amazed the guy’s still alive now. Don’t get me wrong- I like Robert; he’s a good actor, and I’m glad he got his sh*t together, but if I had that lifestyle back then and had broken into someone’s home and crashed out on their kids bed… I’d be in prison now. No one would feel sorry for me; I’d be a disgrace to my family, and none of my friends would have spoken to me again. And I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t get my old job back.
But that’s actually not what I want to talk about now. I want to talk about this little fad called “sex addiction”. Here’s what I want to know: why is it when a celebrity cheats on his wife with 20 hot chicks he’s suddenly a sex addict?…
Let me tell you something about guys: We want to have sex. And we want to have sex all the time. In case you didn’t get that, let me repeat: WE WANT TO HAVE SEX. It’s how we’re built, it’s in our DNA, it’s in our genes (pun intended); it’s left over from the cave man days when we felt the instinct to spread our seed to as many females as we could to propagate the species. We are NOT sex addicts. (For the record, there’s a lot of debate over whether or not sex addiction is a real addiction. Take this as you will.) Women want to reproduce with the most ideal male possible. They want to reproduce with the most powerful, strongest, most likely male to provide for their offspring. Don’t get mad, ladies… it’s just primal instinct for us men. We’re not that far out of the cave yet, evolutionarily speaking.
However, celebrities are apparently an exception to the rule. They are rich and powerful. They can provide for offspring. Subconsciously, that’s also what women are looking for, even if they don’t want kids, and most likely what attracts them to celebrities. Again, men want to have sex; that’s why they like being celebrities because hundreds, thousands, of women are attracted to them. A man becomes a celebrity, becomes rich, and women will literally throw themselves at him. Now… if he’s single, as the public, we don’t care. He can have “sexual relations” with as many of these women as he wants; but if he’s married, that’s a no-no. In the good old days, the celebrity would cheat on his wife, get caught, pay her millions and get divorced. Rarely was an apology heard. He was just being a guy. NOW we get press conferences where a crying man apologizes for all the pain he’s caused his family, friends and fans. Which is interesting because I happen to be a fan of Jesse James and Sandra Bullock, and I wasn’t really hurt by what he did. Tiger Woods didn’t hurt me either (but, then again, I hate golf so I really don’t give a sh*t what those guys do.) Anyway, after the apologies, they more often than not “admit” to being sex addicts and go into rehab. (By the way, is there anything dumber than putting people in a resort together who admit they want to bang everyone around them? Just wondering.)
So what do I hear from people? “Oh, poor Tiger/Jesse, he has an addiction. Poor guy.” …No. They don’t have addictions; they have penises! If I cheated on my wife with 20 chicks and then claimed I was a “sex addict”, do you know what I’d get? Divorced, that’s what! My family would call me an a**hole, disown me and adopt my wife. My friends would kick my ass (or at least what was left of it after my wife kicked the crap out if it), then take her side and never speak to me again. I wouldn’t go to therapy, I wouldn’t get counseling, and no one would take my side. Why? Because I’m not Jesse-f*ing-James, or Tiger-f*ing-Woods. I can’t hit a little ball into a little hole, and I can’t build custom choppers. I’m a guy with needs that I keep in check because I’m not a total douchebag. Do I want to have sex with almost every woman I see? Yes. Do I? NO! Because I’m a good guy.
Our culture has always had a habit of cutting celebrities a lot of slack. If any of us did half the sh*t Downy or James or Woods did, we would not have our lives the way they are now, and chances are our lives would be in ruin. So I guess my real question is; Why do these people, who in the grand scheme of life mean very little, get away with so much?
Continuing the Discussion
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Addiction Treatment Centers - Sex addiction ‘up for debate’
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May 12, 201012:28 am -
Mental Disorders 101
But? I'm an Addict! ? Gimme This and That…
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May 12, 20108:38 am
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