SURPRISE!! You asked for it!!
Posted By: Steel Tip | March 26, 2010 | 5 comments
Before I get started here, I would like to go on record as saying I don’t advocate Surprise Sex; the title to this blog may lead you to believe otherwise, but I assure you… I’m not telling anyone out there to just run up to random people and start humping them like a dog (unless of course you’re Megan Fox and you want to hump me like a dog). That being said, I bet you’re wondering as to what Surprise Sex is, why you asked for it, or perhaps how you can find and beat me? Let’s get right into it, shall we!?
There is no greater term for this act than Surprise Sex. It lightens the mood when the subject matter comes up. Taken in the right context, it’s actually quite pleasant; I mean EVERYONE loves surprises, right? And EVERYONE (well over the age of 17… wait this is 2010- make that 14 or younger) loves sex, right? It’s like getting your cake and eating it too (whatever the f*ck that means)! Let’s go back to a time before the term Surprise Sex even existed. Have you ever seen Deliverance??? And I’m not just saying that because it’s guy on guy… I was really afraid to go down south for months after seeing that movie! But today, with shows like Law and Order: SVU and Californication (both top notch shows by the way) are we just being desensitized / shown sex is awesome. Maybe… all I know is that the remake of The Last House on the Left didn’t make me NOT want to go on vacation. But entertainment is not just to blame… YOU deserve as much blame as Hollywood!
I would like to remind everyone that these girls today, and not just sorority girls, dress like they want to get f*cked. When I’m at the bar, and a girl is wearing sexy heels, a skirt that barely covers her ass, and a top that seems like it covers less than an actual bra would, I wonder how many guys are about to run a train on her in the bathroom. Sure… she may say “blah blah blah I want to feel sexy blah blah blah”… but YOU’RE INVITING A GUY TO TRY AND GET SOME!!! If you had a twin and she wore a Cosby sweater, do you really think guys would be trying to plug up her hole? Okay… maybe she’d get hit on… but not one guy would try to force themselves on her, when she looks like she may scream, and you’re sitting next to her in the outfit that screams “I HAVE THREE HOLES, TWO HANDS, AND I’M WILLING TO LET YOU HAVE A GO AT MY EAR!!”
Bottom line, these girls today, whether they be in high school or college (seriously, when did girls start looking like they do in 7th grade? They practically pass for 18 yr olds now!) dress the part… so expect to be hit on. On top of dressing like they work on the corner, they willingly accept drinks a guy(s) buy them. Really? You don’t expect to be flirted with? You don’t expect to be creeped on? I’m sorry ladies, but if you dress like a slut and accept the drinks some guy who’s been hitting on you all night, you have no one to blame but yourself when he “trips” and “slips” inside you (let’s be honest, you’re a slut not wearing panties because they don’t match your obviously short skirt) and decides to just keep on going. Personally, I think if the dude continues he should scream “SURPRISE! YOU ASKED FOR IT!”
Steel Tip’s Final Thoughts
DO NOT blame anyone but yourselves, ladies, for guys creeping on you and trying to get some all the time. The way YOU dress caused this.
DO NOT come crying to me, or any other guy friend, because you’re upset. YOU accepted the drinks.
YOU dressed like a slut + YOU accepted the drinks + YOU flirted back to keep getting drinks = YOUR fault. Don’t bitch to me.
Until next time, I’m Steel Tip and you’re ugly… stay classy Blogadelphia!
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Steel Tip March 29, 2010 at 12:21 pm
If you’re accepting drinks from me all night, I would hope that there was some interest… I’m not saying let’s run off to the bathroom, but If I’m buying you a drink, I have an interest.
And I’m sure if the ONLY thing you’re wearing is that bright orange vest, then of course you get drinks all the time… and possibly crabs from the bar stool.
Jennifer March 28, 2010 at 8:43 pm
If a guy willingly supplies me with alcohol all night, only expecting something in return… he should expect to learn a lesson. Obviously men should learn to stay away from scantly dressed females circling the bar. (duh)
Street workers? Like… construction? Cause a bright orange vest with a reflector gets me drinks all the time.
Steel Tip March 28, 2010 at 6:54 pm
If YOU females didn’t (barely) dress like street workers, men wouldn’t be seeking you out.
And if a guy supplies you with alcohol ALL night, he should at least get something in return in his investment… even if it’s a phone number to go on a date in the future… or a BJ… just saying
joann March 27, 2010 at 4:53 pm
Most men think they r gonna get laid from a chick at the bar that they buy drinks for.Its been like that for years.As far as apparel,dress like a slot,expect to be treated like one!Dont wake up and oh shit what did I do?Cause if you dont know, then You shouldnt be out drinking.
Jennifer March 27, 2010 at 4:29 pm
Yeah… the funny thing is that YOU guys seek out these women to “hit” on and buy drinks… sending the signal to insecure women everywhere that this way of dressing is what is necessary in order to get attention. Maybe men should set their standards a little lower than playboy bunny, Megan Fox, Holly Madison look-a-likes.
P.S. This is why I wear sweatpants to the bar.
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